How I am Now?

My Mind is frozen ...
My Heart is broken...
My Smile is hiding ...
My Spirit is floating ...
My Soul is searching ...
My Time is wasted ...
My Sight is fading ...
My Life is mussy ...
I Hear no voices ...
I Felt no senses ...
I Taste no flavors ...
I Smelt no scents ...
I Crawl in darkness ...

Flickr

This is a test post from , a fancy photo sharing thing.

I Have Flaws

Others thought that I am good person because i'm easy and fun to be with. Perhaps they are right but i also feel like sometimes that i am :

1. Moody

2. Coward

3. Pathetic

4. Hopeless

5. Overrated

6. A Day Dreamer

7. Slothful

8. Slow

9. Naive

10. Weak

11. A Fashion Victim

12. Ridiculous

13. Loser

14. Disappealing

15. Trying Hard

16. Impatient

17. Unreliable

18. Whiner

19. Clumsy

20. Sticky

21. Hard

23. Hollow

24. Careless

25. Half-wit

And so on and counting ...........I'm Just a human.

I hope everyone will understand...

I...

I am: for real
I think: i am lucky to be healthy
I know: my capacity
I want: to lose extra pounds
I can't: forget him
I have: been hurt by someone i love
I wish: to have a 3 wishes to be granted
I hate: mean people
I miss: someone close to my heart
I fear: to lose a love ones
I feel: relaxed now
I hear: my favorite song now
I smell: good
I play: chess
I crave: for sea foods and fruits
I smile: whenever i thought of happy moments
I search: for things I want to learn about online
I wonder: what will happen in my future
I pretend: to be happy even i am not
I regret: about my past but I know that I shouldn't because you can't change it
I love: to cuddle
I long: to have my own family someday
I care: about how others feel
I always: check my emails and offline messages
I am not: ready to go to bed yet.
I believe: in God
I promise: to keep my promises
I dance: when i am feel to
I sing: in the shower and when i hear my favorite songs
I cry: when someone hurts my feelings and during family issues
I am not always: right
I fight: for my rights and if necessary
I write: a stories and experiences in my blogs
I try: to apologize whenever I am wrong
I never: kill an animal except for insects
I remember: my first love ... the last guy who left me
I confuse: myself
I listen: to a friend in need
I can usually be found: online
I hide: my online status in YM very often
I talk: to sis this morning
I am scared: of snakes
I need: a hug and kisses
I like: going to the beach
I adore: my favorite actress
I help: my family
I treasure: my friends
I seek: for peace
I battle: depression
I expect: to be strong and confident about my self
I should: take an exercise
I still: think about the funny moments that tickle me when I think about them
I already: post a new story in Experience Project

100 Things That Makes Me Happy

1. peace of mind
2. a fresh air to breath
3. a nice weather
4. clean water
5. sweet memories with past relationships
6. reunited family
7. my nieces (Joana, Joyce & Jossa)
8. memories in my high school life
9. meeting an old time friends
10. being inloved and be loved
11. hugs and kisses from my loveones
12. sweet moments from someone i love
13. when hearing the words " I Love You "
14. saying " I Love You"
15. when hearing the words " I Miss You"
16. when someone text me
17. when someone calls me
18. when someone email me
19. when someone come online for a chat
20. listening to my favorite songs
21. watching my favorite tv shows
22. watching a good movie
23. testimonial from a good friends
24. my cellphone
25. my computer
26. my internet
27. finding interesting and useful websites
28. old and new friends added in my friendster list
29. gifts from someone
30. talking to someone I haven't talked to in a long time
31. getting to sleep in
32. knowing I have enough money to spend with
33. having enough money to support for my family
34. hearing a really good joke
35. telling a really good joke
36. shopping
37. picture taking
38. beach outing
39. playing with my nieces & nephew
40. buying a new clothes
41. buying a new gadgets
42. getting a gifts
43. reading a nice and interesting blogs
44. researching something just for the fun of it
45. finding out that there are other people like me out there
46. meeting interesting people
47. watching little kids play
48. finally understanding something i've been trying to figure out
49. when I try to write and I can actually think of something worth reading
50. not having to go to work during rainy season
51. my rest day
52. out of town trip
53. out of the country's trip
54. hanging outs with my best friends
55. swimming in nice pool or beaches
56. seeing a dolphin
57. seeing different kind of fish
58. falling sleep with someone holding me
59. when i get compliment
60. seeing somebody doing something nice for someone else
61. sharing a smile with a random person
62. learning something new
63. finding something i've been looking for
64. hearing a song that brings back a memory
65. when someone promises they're going to do something and actually does it
66. finding a perfectly comfortable spot to sit and being able to stay sitting there for a while
67. knowing the answer when someone asks me a question
68. being able to tell my stories
69. hearing good news
70. getting paid
71. donating gifts for less fortunate children
72. when someone tells me they LOVE Me
73. when someone tells me they MISS Me
74. dressing up a really nice clothes
75. when someone kiss me in very romantic place
76. when someone kiss me in the mornig
77. breakfast in bed with someone i love
78. when someone holds my hand in front of his family and friends
79. when someone remembers something about me i figured they'd forget
80. sweet dreams
81. waking up in the morning after a good nights sleep
82. walking into somewhere and having everyone say hi to me
83. having that feeling that something magical is going on
84. being able to help someone that is helpless
85. when someone else can see that I really am doing the best I can
86. when someone trust me without a doubts
87. when everyone around me is happy
88. when I trust a someone else and it works out
89. when someone appreciate me
90. all the sweet little things my boyfriend gives and tells me
91. wearing my favorite clothes
92. having a nice job
93. if got i learn to drive
94. if i learn to cook good food
    
95. if i have my own house
96. if someone proposed a marriage
97. if i'll get married
98. if i have a baby
99. if i have another baby (-;
100. the fact that im done with this
     
     
     

Q & A :

The personal questions i love and hate to answer sometimes ....

• How do you define Love ? --- Love isn't about looking for the perfect one... but finding perfection within the imperfect one...." " Love is patient and kind ... and consistent "
  
• What is your dream wedding ? ---- A Beach Wedding (-;
  
• What is your motto in life ? --- It's better to give than to receive, so what are you waiting for share your blessings .. im waiting ! (-; kidding
  
• What is your ideal guy ? --- A laid back guy, humble, god fearing, responsible, financially and emotionally stable, with sense of humor, being cute is a plus but not a requirement.
  
• What is your dream vacations ? --- Around the world trip .
  
• What is your greatest dream ? --- Have my own happy family. To be a mother with a loving husband. A nice home and a better job.
  
• Who is your first love ? ---- Mr. N.T. (My classmate during high school)
  
• What is your greatest fear ? --- To die young without fulfilling yet my dreams.
  
• How do you treasure true friends ? --- I keep them for life even without seeing them often.
• What makes you cry most? ---- Family issues and " Heart " issues.
  
• Do you love from your head or your heart? --- Maybe i should use both now... 'coz every time i used my heart alone i hurt the most...
  
• What type of person is your soul mate? --- I'm having a hard time finding him... well just a typical guy who truly loves me. Someone who can't live without me... someone i can't live without.
  

Things I Hate...

Anything that makes me feel sad and mad... things that will irritate me... things that will mess my day.

1. I hate heavy traffic.
2. I hate oil price hike!
3. I hate too much taxes if the government official uses them for personal use only.
4. I hate smoke belchers, i can't breath in their air.
5. I hate too hot weather, it makes me sweat a lot.
6. I hate scammers, i've been a victim of them.
7. I hate corrupt officials they're not good example to young people.
8. I hate fraud people 'coz i have been fooled by someone .
9. I hate people who manipulate others life.
10. I hate a man who abused his woman, just like my dad who hurt mom.
11. I hate an abusive and betrayal friend, they're not worth it.
12. I hate too loud person, they're empty.
13. I hate parents who abandoned their childs.
14. I hate people who do crimes, they're evil's advocate.
15. I hate a " kiss & tell " and " touch & go " guys.
16. I hate mean girls... they're crap !
17. I hate a high maintenance guy, i couldn't afford them.
18. I hate to be neglected by someone i really care 'coz they will hurt me bad.
19. I hate to be in a situations where i couldn't have an options or a chance to choose for what i really wanted to do.
20. I hate to pretend that i am good even if i really feel bad.

My Favorites

List of my favorite stuff...

• Color : Pink, Purple, Yellow,
• TV Shows : GMA Kapuso, Selected ABS CBN TV Shows, Oprah, The Swan etc..
• Animals : Dogs, Cats, Fish
• Local Actress : Claudine Barreto, Cristine Hermosa, Angel Locsin, Donita Rose, Sharon Cuneta, Gretchen Barreto, Judy Ann Santos
• Local Actor : Piolo Pascual, Richard Guttierez, Richard Gomez, Dingdong Dantes
• Foreign Actress: Angelina Jolie, Liv Tyler
• Foreign Actor: Brad Pitt, Tom Cruise, Orlando Bloom
• Comedian: Robin Williams, Adam Sandler
• Singer: Mariah Carey, Regine Velasquez, Mandy Moore, WestLife etc...
• Gadget : PC , CellPhone & Digicam, Ipod & Portable DVD & Laptop (3 of my wishlists)
• Beverage : Juice, Soda, Ice Tea
• Brands: Any brands that offers good quality products
• Candy/Snack: fresh fruits, sandwich
• Favorite Song : too many to mention
• Food : Filipino and Chinese Foods
• Fruits : Mango, Strawberry, Banana, Pineapple and more
• Appliances: TV's, Ref , Washing Machine
• Vehicle: i don't have one
• City: my city
• Clothing Store/Label: what ever is comfortable,and what ever makes me feel good about myself
• Films: The Notebook, A Walk to Remember, A Walk in the Clouds, Titanic, The Wedding Date, Maid in Manhattan, Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, The Matrix, Superman, Spider Man, X-Men
• Flower/Plant: Roses, Orchids
• Hero: The Parents, The Soldiers, The Teachers, The Doctors, Those Filipino Overseas Workers
• Hotel/Motel: lots to chose from, pick one anyone
• Indulgence: food ,thats why exercise comes in
• Leisure Activities: net surfing, blogging, web hosting, hanging outs with friends, shopping, malling, sleeping
• Local Hang-Out: none at this time ,home
• Publications: My blog site
• Music: love songs, rnb, pop, alternative, soft rock
• Pets: i used to like dogs but i don't prefer them to stay inside the house
• Place To Live: quiet, small but peaceful community, along the beach
• Political Figure: Ninoy Aquino
• Radio Show: Love Radio
• Season: Summer, Winter (even we don't have here )
• Sports: Swimming & Chess
• Sports Team: Filipino Athletes
• Travel Destination: USA, Canada, Australia, Europe and Other Asian Countries ( possible when budget permits me, sponsors are very much welcome (-; )

I Am...

• I am proud to be Filipina and i love my country only hate the corrupt officials.
• I am sensitive with the needs of others especially my loveones.
• I am open minded person.
• I am not into any sport now but i do enjoy swimming.
• I am home body person but also love outdoors.
• I am not gambler.
• I am low profile person who's down to earth and respect different kind of people.
• I am good a friend but hate an abusive friend.
• I am not after of fame, a recognition will do.
• I am naughty but nice most of the time.
• I am not a social climber just simple woman.
• I am a good provider, a bread winner of the family.
• I am a good daughter but still have some misunderstanding to my mom which is normal in a family.
• I am not an intellectual person but smart enough to deal with others, in situations and other things.
• I am kind and loving person.
• I am not perfect, well no one does.
• I am a hardworking person but also in lazy mood sometimes.
• I am a strong person but also have weaknesses.
• I am not a superwoman, i feel tired too.
• I am only human who haves sins, and will commit sins...

My Qualities & Imperfections ...

• I'm a low profile person but a decent woman.
• I'm snob but never be a mean girl.
• I'm not as pretty as a star but confident enough to interact with friends and others.
• I'm not be always smiling but there's jolly side of me you might be like.
• I'm naive but have the courage to try anything that will improve my personality.
• I'm still single but sexy (i think so) and wild (in a right manner) ! and still enjoying it (-;
• I'm a boring person but just being silent and peaceful.
• I'm clumsy (maybe when in love) but not a tackless.
• I'm quiet but also have loud side sometimes.
• I'm naive but willing to try something new.
• I can teach but not a good teacher.
• I can cook but not a good cook.
• I can swim but not a good swimmer.
• I can sing but not a good singer.
• I can write but not a good writer.
• I can dance but not a dancer.

My Disappointments

My Past & Present Disappointments in Life...

1. Mutual Understanding (M.U.) : the only things i had with my first love (during high school days), he's too shy to tell me what he feels then, "Torpe " is what i called him.
2. My first boyfriend who failed to give me the first kiss i ever wanted. He's too respectful or maybe just too shy, ... maybe because he thought that i have so many limitations then, is it my fault? i have no idea...
3. Letting my family choose the course in college i am not really interested with that time.
4. My brother who choose to have a miserable life.
5. My dad : a one day millionaire. Who always hurt my mom, us.
6. One of my best of friends (Anna) lost in touch with me for more than a year now.
7. My superior who failed to recognized the good performances I've done.
8. People who under estimated my capacity at work and as a person.
9. People who cursed and judged me with out knowing me well.
10. Keeping a 4 years relationship that is not worthful.
11. Falling in love in an " online guy " that I've never seen in person yet.
12. For those people i consider friends but were just using me for their own benefit.
13. For those friends whom i confess a secret but failed to keep it.
14. For someone whom i trust and love so much but just hurting me and leave me.
15. Me being a victim of " budol budol gang " or what we called " scammers ".

Live and Learn and Pass It On (my version)

1. I've learned that you can never be a good person if your not a good friend.
2. I've learned that it's worth the hardship of teaching my niece Joana when she got a good grades in her school card.
3. I've learned that my Sis still the best sis in the world.
4. I've learned that even i am not " church person " i still have faith in God.
5. I've learned that i should always bought same stuff (either clothes or bags etc.) for my twin nieces Joyce & Jossa for them to avoid an envious fight between each others.
6. I've learned that it's better to keep mouth shut when you have nothing good to say to others unless he/she really deserves it.
7. I've learned that i shouldn't keep a secret to those people i can't trust.
8. I've learned that it's grateful to have a friend who keeps your secrets.
9. I've learned that my mom still care for dad even he's not worth it.
10. I've learned that it's not hard to forget the person who made you cried even he keeps avoiding you.
11. I've learned that i can't please anyone, anyway who cares?!
12. I've learned that i should love my enemies 'coz it will pissed them off !
13. I've learned that my true friends always care for me even i seldom see them.
14. I've learned that i should not be feel pressured by people around me to settle down if i still haven't find the right man for me.
15. I've learned that i should post this blog, 'coz its a nice thing to do...

Know me more ........

Anything and funny things about me....

I have a fair and light complexion skin with an average body built which I think sexy enough compare to others.

Being sexy is an attitude, it’s how you project and carry yourself in front of the people. It is not only seen in your physical appearance or your vital statistics. It’s a matter of self confidence and how you speak up to others.

I used to have a short hair when I was in college, but I started to make it long for 4 years and still enjoying it.

A frustrated Cover Girl ! (-;

A former Cover Girl turn " Calendar Girl " ? ( Just another frustration ) (-;

I am a cry baby... only few friends know 'coz my family haven't seen me that way before. I'm a sentimental person... i can't help my tears to fall every time i got hurt. It's my way of releasing the pain inside me...its normal, very usual act in an ordinary woman like me who lives complicated life.

Chess is the only sports I've ever joined when I was in high school.

DLSU- D (My Alma Matter)

A part time student during college, a service crew in the leading food chains of the country.



Singapore : The first ever country i visited so far.


USA: My Dream Destination




Take me to the Beach ...my favorite getaway !

Starting a Blog ...

Before i finally hook in Blogs creation i have read some journal from other blogs member and i've noticed that the most creative and unique blogs i've seen were using Blogger. Blogger offers personalized URL for your blogs but you have to pay for it so i choose to used their free subscriptions 'coz i am just a new member here maybe someday i'll avail it.For now i am still on a scratch... can't finalized yet my layout designs. I need more ideas to make it more interesting.I want colorful design so i choose blended colors of pink and violets. I added also my slideshows, media player and other widgets to make it more live. I am trying my best to be more creative... i hope i could make it well.

First TIme @ Blogger

I've been a " net explorer " for such a long time but i never thought of trying this kind of idea before. I'm a private person and afraid to broadcast my life to the whole world 'coz i don't wanna be a " talk of the town " and i don't wanna hear any side comments that will mess my day. Another thing is that i am quite busy then focusing my self exploring and learning new things , finding new friends and soul mates online thru this kind of technology we have right now. I've met so many friends and interesting people online and i find it pretty cool to be recognized by others outside your hometown. Theres a failure and success stories behind that but i will not put it here on my first blog.
So now i am starting this idea 'coz think its nice thing for me to do. I'ts a new learning ideas for me and i am not afraid to try this thing as long as it will not ruin others life. Any good or bad comments are very much appreciated... i respect all your opinion guys so ill just keep you posted. CHeer Up!